How do I Change Something About Myself That Is No Longer Serving Me?

If you're here looking for an easy answer to this question, you're in the wrong place. The truth is, there is no easy answer. That being said, I want to congratulate you for acknowledging that something isn't working. That's a huge step.

Seriously though, it's HUGE. Many of us wander through life completely oblivious to just about everything. Having the ability to recognize that there is a quality in yourself you would like to work on is literally you pulling yourself out of the Matrix and taking action. That's pretty freaking awesome.

This article is a follow-up to a previous blog post about my tone of voice challenges. I recommend you read that one here.

So here you are, confronted with a really big issue. You know that there is a problem that is holding you back, but you don't know how to fix it. The first thing I would like to recommend is that we rename a couple of things.

Let's try changing the word "problem," to "challenge." Next let's change the word "fix," to "clarify." We are now faced with a challenge we would like to clarify. That seems much more manageable. It also feels a lot kinder. It's so important to be kind with ourselves when we are in a vulnerable state.

I am currently in the throes of dealing with one of two of these challenges, so I'll use this article to delve into how I'm going to clarify them for myself.

Challenge #1: I tend to lose my motivation when I'm in a relationship. I focus a lot less on my own goals and instead fall into a co-dependent fantasyland. This generally leads to my heart being crushed, or at the very least bruised, and me falling behind on the things that are really important to me.

Challenge #2: I sometimes give up if I'm not seeing immediate results. Patience is a virtue that I possess only when it's detrimental to me (see above). As I am currently in the throes of a brand new business, I am facing this challenge every. single. day.

All right, so I have labeled my challenges. Now what? I'm going to start with four thin