Loss can be upsetting, right?
I have been absolutely devastated by loss in the past (in the not-so-distant past also).
Loss can come in the serious forms of a job, a loved one, a breakup, a pet passing. I have had to deal with all of those things in the last couple of years and it hasn’t been easy.
Loss can also come when a sock disappears magically on laundry day. Where do they go?
Life can often feel like you’re moving stoically from one loss to another. You keep moving and things keep slipping away. It’s almost impossible sometimes to not focus on the losses. You practically become blind to everything you are also gaining and achieving.
A couple of nights ago, the wind came rushing through my window and knocked down a vase of flowers I had been desperately trying to hold onto long past their expiration date. I had followed all the instructions. I was replacing the water. I put sugar in the water. I added aspirin. I really wanted the flowers to last. I don’t exactly know why this was so important to me, but it was. Maybe subconsciously I wasn’t ready for any more loss.
The vase made a horrible sound as it shattered into millions of shards on my kitchen floor. In fact, even this morning as I pulled out a cookie sheet for my ginger cookies, I found it covered in little pieces of glass.
I was immediately reminded of a sense of loss and disappointment.
Then I realized something. Yesterday morning, with pieces of glass still sitting in my sink drain, I went to visit a friend.
Without knowing anything about the previous night’s ordeal, she gave me a poinsettia. It is sitting currently under my Christmas tree. Its presence there is calming, comforting and warming.
Then I had a revelation. Something was taken away from me and was replaced with something fresh and beautiful. Just like magic.
It got me thinking about life. Let’s be honest- everything gets me thinking. I’m an over-thinker. It’s one of my biggest challenges and something I grapple with daily.
Anyhow, I started thinking about all the times people have told me that loss is only making room for something new. Though I believed in the concept in an ethereal sense, I had rarely been presented with such concrete evidence.
Sure, you lose a job and you get another one... eventually.
You get your heart broken and you fall in love again... someday.
I’m not always the most patient person, so the idea of making room for new and better has never been an easy pill for me to swallow.
Until now. 12 hours was all it took. The speed and efficiency of it made a lightbulb go off in my head.
It’s true, I thought! Everything that leaves you will be replaced. Sometimes it happens right away (yes, please) and sometimes it takes time (working on accepting that).
But it always works. That’s pretty freaking comforting.
Has this happened to you? I would love to know.